Warning: Long Post

(This post was inspired by Zhu)

It's a strange mixture of a deluxe cosmopolitan and a less lavish and more drifter-like feeling to simultaneously make you feel like you're always on foreign land and at the same time feel right at home on three different continents. 

Five things that make me an Asian:

1.    My dad is Asian and thusly there's this whole side of the pedigree that's Asian. Too bad I can't speak my Asian family's tongue and if you ever wondered whether it's possible not to learn your father's native tongue, I am living proof that it is. In his defense, he did try to teach me...

2.    I am enamored of the East in a way that I cannot explain. Just BEING in the Orient makes me feel so content. Love Asian food, love rickshaws, love straw hats, love the crazy traffic, the insane bargaining over a dime, I love absolutely everything Asian. Moreover, I have an inexplicable love for the third world that keeps calling me back... and let's not forget Thai foot massage, Himalayan jasmine tea and Indian mango lasse!

3.    Even though it wasn't until the tender age of 10 that I first set foot in Asia, it immediately resonated with me in that it was both noisy and quiet, fast and slow, tranquil and aggravating, abundantly rich and shockingly poor, pampering and disturbing all at the same time.  

4.    I am crazy about all the street food (though not big on curry), I miss being able to buy a cracked open coconut at the junction and drink it with a straw, and don't even get me started on fresh mango juice or freshly pressed sugarcane juice. I am a big advocate of the Asian beauty regimen. Wax legs instead of shaving, get eyebrows done the Asian way (threading, where a thread is used in place of tweezers to pluck any stray hair -- I know the Asian readers know exactly what I talking about but this method isn't well known here in the US or even in Europe, even though it's by far the best). 

5.    Asian bathrooms and I have had our differences, and I will be the first to admit that I am not a fan. I have however mastered a whole assortment of techniques that get me in and out of there safe and dry. I can't believe I am actually saying this, but I think that the "hole-in-the-ground" style public toilets do actually make more sense than the English ones. You know, from a hygiene point of view alone. Squat toilets are a perfect example of great theory meets poor execution. 

Moi in Asia:

(the first one's in India and the second one I believe is in Pakistan)

 

Five things that make me European:

1.    Was born in Europe. I can only speak a couple of European languages but I do get by in most EU countries. I am totally proud of this aspect of me. 

2.    I so LOVE Europe!!!! I miss the architecture, the life style, all the walking streets and cafes. I love the mixture of banality and glamour, the style and I adore small towns. You know, the current green movement? Like having your own grocery bags instead of the disposable plastic ones at the checkout counter? You know, back in Europe, when I was a young girl, we used wicker grocery baskets for shopping. Pretty woven baskets to carry half a loaf of fresh French bread, vegetables and cheese in. 

We also had hot fresh bread every single day but Sunday, straight out of the bakery. It sounds so romantic and I guess it was.

3.    European accents are so so so pretty! At least I think so. OK, my W's don't sound like V's and I am fluent in English, but I definitely pronounce the T in "dentist" "intersection" and "bounty"! I don't say toe-maah-toe but I'll say beet roots instead of beets. I don't call a pill a tablet, a cell phone a mobile, a condo a flat, an elevator a lift, but I can't help but stick a "please" at the end of my order in a restaurant -- as in "Could I have a cup of coffee please?".   

4.    The most obvious symptom indicating that underneath the surface I must be European is that I feel morbidly obese at my current 123 lbs.  I simply don't know how to function in society as a less-than-100%-thin person. I am convinced that the day I start sporting a double chin will be the day people will stop bending over backwards and going out of their way to greet me when I enter a room. If I didn't have something bigger to worry about right now, I'd be totally freaking out over the 15 lbs I gained since last year. 

5. Although I can't even remember the last time I picked up a pencil, as an (inactive) artist and illustrator I love that I can just set up shop on a walking street and people pay me to draw their portraits. I can draw with photographic accuracy.

Five things that make me an American:

1.    This is the country I care to call my home,  this is where I pay my taxes, this is where I have a Social Security number and the only place where I don't have to explain the purpose of my visit when my plane lands.

2.    The only place on Earth, where, it doesn't feel like I am traveling. 

3.    Bathrooms! Although any architecture is closer to my heart than the wonders of the American construction world, it still only makes sense to me that bedrooms should come with attached bathrooms, that buildings should have central air (love the moodiness of European radiators, but those incredibly loud unreliable A/C boxes sticking out of every Asian window just aren't my cup of tea.) And in spite of all the lavatory skills I have flawlessly mastered along way, including adventurously "showering" from a bucket of ice cold water in the middle of rural Asia  -- I have to admit that I love love love our big American bathrooms with showers and tubs and windows and and all the light bulbs and the fluffy floor mats and soft robes.  

4.    Driving is second nature to me. That being said, I would never, ever, not in a million years drive in Asia!!!! Especially in India! (I already have but we won't talk about that...)

 

5.    In Asia, I feel American. In Europe, I feel American. In America however, I feel European and Asian. At heart, I am truly, equally all of them.

photo credits: Geoff (pictures of me), Gaiam (fountain), SPA travel+beauty+living (Bhutan photo), Malaysian Garden (Malaysian garden photo), She Helix (grocery basket photo), Starbucks Shared Planet (paper cup photo), Balki Blog (Indian street photo) 

P.S.: If you're multi-cultured you're "tagged" {That's you, Nancy :-D}. Anyone who decides to do this tag, leave a link to your URL, I love reading stuff like this. 

Comments

[Tara]

Hey, good to read all this about you..
I am reading you for some time now but this must be my first comment.. I have been silently admiring you and the courage you are exhibiting under the circumstances.. I am sure God gives us the means. My prayers and hope that you guys get out of the worries very soon..

[colours]

WOW Agnes!!! That resonated completely ... as an Indian living in Europe (with homes in two countries) and with home of parents in US... will probably pick up the tag if I do not have to work too late tomorrow.

The picture of the monastry - which one is it?

[Donald Swarbrick]

I think your fantastic no matter what nationality you may be, your travels are something I would love to do, but don't seem to get round to it, though I have seen more of my own country, than most patriots.
I look forward to your every post, as you always hold my interest.

[Nancy]

Hehe...the long post warning was so enticing tht I clicked the link immediately. Just loved the post Agnes...u should do more tags u knw;-D.

Wow u can draw....then why havent u put them up??? We'd love to see them. Guess wht, we got lots of stuff in common like the T's in the middle of the words...I pronounce all of them too tho beg to differ on the pronounciation of toe mat toe;-D

Dunno where u got the idea I'm multi cultured[gosh even the word sounds so 'cool'] & all tht. I maybe staying in the middle of a desert but still live there like a typical Indian;-D

[bins]

That was a really interesting post. That will really be an interesting tag to take up.

I totally understand your take on the toilets. And u are right the hole in the ground is far more hygienic. When I travel, i practically want to leave my intestines behind.

And no, no one in their right mind should drive in India. It's crazy.

watch out for my response to ur tag!

[Soul]

You are so GLOBAL, Agnes. That's one of the best (one of the..., I said) traits of you. Next time, you land here in India, take to driving again....

Great post.

*smiles*

[Amelia]

thanks for sharing Agnes :) love the photos :)

[scribble]

wow! i wish i had such multicultural experiences..i could only relate to the asian things u mentioned ..i loved the post.
i dint know about the eyebrows bit, they dont do threading in the US?
also, show us ur drawings.

[Agnes]

Oh so glad you guys liked it. It turned out to be so long, I didn't have the patience to read through it myself.

@ Scribble, well, threading is well known here in Asian circles, but the general populace waxes (I know!!!) or tweezes their brows. I go to an Asian beauty parlor to get my eyebrows threaded.

@ Bins, I could write a whole post about Asian bathrooms :-))))

@ Nancy, isn't the Disneyland that is Dubai more middle eastern than Indian though?

@ Donald, ah, thanks. I LOVE compliments :-)))

@ Soul: LOL I could never drive in India!

@ Colors: Bhutan :-) And great, I want to read yours! Leave us a link.

@ Tara, hi :-))) Thank you so much. He's ready to start radiation. I can't wait to have all of this over with and have him be healthy again. But I think we are getting there and I am thankful for that.

@ Thanks Amelia :-)

[Judy.Harper]

Agnes-I lived in Okinawa for a year and love anything Oriental. I brought items back with me, so now my living room and dining room are decorated in Oriental style. The Oriental people are such gentle social people. I agree with Nancy, I would love to see some of your drawings. You and Geoff take care!

[Sylvia]

This is a WONDERFUL post. You know I know exactly what you mean.

I remember my first time at American "summer camp" and my best friend was crying with homesickness. "What is this thing?" I asked her, it made no sense to me. A longing for a place where you weren't? That's a constant state of being, not something to cry over!

I think the feeling of never being quite home does make it easier to wander, don't you?

[Sylvia]

Actually, forgive me for linking to my own stuff on your blog but I think you'll like this:

Where I'm From on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

[Agnes]

@ Judy: Wow! I'd love to live in Japan for a year! Do you speak Japanese?

Oh @ Sylvia, you nailed it. Homesickness is something I just can't comprehend. Your Flickr link was beautiful beyond words -- I was so tempted to comment but don't have a Flickr account so I couldn't. Just BEAUTIFUL. I read your post about your Oma too (my German is not as good as it used to be, but I understood every single word) -- beautiful writing.

[Inwardsun]

Agnes of the world :) So many people would only dream of experience all the things you have experienced, not because you've been to so many countries but because you have learnt to appreciate and respect the beauty of culture. The little things that separate us, like little baskets for shopping or how we take our coffee (p.s for the green movement, Scandinavia rocks!) but the humanity that unites us.

Feeling homesick doesn't need to relate to a certain spot in the world. It can be a memory of a cup of tea shared amongst strangers. And remember, in the moments when you need it, that all the people you have crossed paths with, are thinking of you with a smile.

Kram! (Some Swedish for ya ;)

[vange]

I spent a big chunk of my childhood on a boat in Canada. That's hardly as fascinating.

[Heather Landry]

You completely amaze me with your world travels. This was a wonderful post Agnes. I wish I could say I'd been as many places as you have!

[Mehreen]

The thing I love most about you is you being so sensitive and receptive to the little things in life. And you make life look so simple and easy. Love how you express it!

(:

[Geoff]

My Dear Agnes;
Very well said and written so well. Traveling moves us all by forcing us to see life differently, if only for a short period, and in those magical moments, we change and grow. I love who you are and where you've been is part of that. Oddly, having a serious illness has quite a bit in common with traveling in that one has to learn quickly to function in different spiritual places rather than physical locations but never-the-less, different places. I love reconnecting with memories of village life in England as a kid, or as an adult in Tamil Nadu, or as a man in Karachi on a warm morning, or Tokyo in the snow ........ so many great moments. Thanks for the post.
Love
Geoff

[limenlemons]

great post :) was a lot of fun to read.
i could relate to pretty much all of it though have to admit i havent lived outside India at all. i guess globalisation is the reason behind that. we r now more aware of different cultures, life styles, habits of different countries than ever before. maybe we are all a little bit multi cultural that way.....we pick up bits here and there no matter where u may reside.

[dolly]

wow~!
u're multi races!
very well written post!

[Lucky]

A fun inspiring read which brought back many fine memories ...

And I just realized in reading your post, that it was in Asia when I first realized
that life opened up for me. ... or ... I opened up for life...
Definitely something changed for the better by going there.

[angeli]

Nice post, Agnes. I think you'd be a great travel writer. :)

[Sadiya]

Hey Agnes

....and aren't you lucky to be able to have the opportunity of being able to have best of all worlds, being an Indian and living in New Zealand for more than a decade, I always felt fortunate to be able to pick and learn best from both worlds as every culture has their own +'s and -'s right?? but you to me seem like the oh so fortunate to be exposed and able to learn from so many of them.

I am sure that's what makes you a wonderful person that you are :)

But I still wonder, what makes you so picture perfect hahaha

Indian toilets (though I personally dont like it) but totally agree with you that it is by far the most hygenic way of doing it ;)

Well keep in touch, will do too.

[Agnes]

Thanks @Angeli, that would be my dream job :-D Please hire me!

@Sadiya, I have never been to NZ but I am enamored by the little I know about it. Lucky told me it is amazingly beautiful. NZ is actually on my list of countries where I want to live with Geoff, for a year or two. Then move over to Morocco!

@Lucky, same here. Asia is just spellbinding.

@Dolly, thanks. Not sure about the multi-race thing though. Genetically speaking I think I am just your average caucasian girl.

@LimeAndLemos, exactly so. Though there's something to be said about actually living your day-to-day existence somewhere remote. I like that. I like navigating long distances.

@Geoff, America and England, the two lands divided by a common language. I really, really loved being in England, Geoff. And the time you and I spent in Ireland? Just thinking about those weeks (or was it months? it probably was) makes me smile ear to ear...

@Mehreen, what a lovely thing to say -- thank you. One thing I notice about people who are chronically unhappy is that their happiness depends largely on outside circumstances. Know what I mean? Like in some people's lives, rain has the power of ruining their weekend. Or the fact that the local food is too spicy. Or whatever. I guess, happiness is something you generate, rather than something that should be presented to you. Something like that.

Oh and by the way, I am making it a point to answer all the comments, because it was pointed out to me that it was rude not to. I never thought it was rude not to, I guess when a subject has been beaten to death, and there isn't much left to say, then there's no point in dragging the conversation out. But it turns out I am actually enjoying answering comments, so please do tell me, does anyone actually come back just to read my response to their comment or am I wasting my time trying not to be "rude"?

[Inwardsun]

About answering comments: I used to leave comments unanswered before, but have found that you get a much better connection with people if you answer back. I guess it depends on what has been said, but I mean, it's pretty cool that someone out there actually takes the time to write a comment in the first place. On wordpress there is a "follow up" on "my comments" so you click there and see threads. On other blogs i read, I will sometimes check back and see if there is anything new said about the post.

Hope you are doing ok and Geoff too!

[Agnes]

InwardSun: I wasn't done answering!!!! LOL I went to make a cup of tea (Himalayan jasmine tea -- heavenly I tell you) So I didn't get to your comment yet -- I had 3 more left to answer :-)

I quite agree with you. One of the most beautiful things I have observed in life is that you take these things with you wherever you go. Kind of like Judy said her living room looked all Japanese. Any time I drink jasmine tea, I am reminded of Pakistan... the smell of Arabian jasmine transports me back to... to many places actually. Then certain music brings me back to Tibetan monasteries... and so on. I am richer for it.

@Vange, are you kidding me? It is totally fascinating! I'd love to live on a boat for a while :-)

@Heather, I couldn't imagine my life any other way, really.

[Inwardsun]

...and now it seemed like I was being rude because you hadn't answered mine, but that was NOT my intention, haha! :) Anyway, Pakistan is on my visit list from now on. Enjoy your tea and take care!

[Judy Harper]

Agnes-I only learned to speak a small amount of Okinawan. Things like yes, stop, though I do think it is a beautiful language. Thanks for your comment today. I love my deck, even in the winter, I can sit in the sunroom and watch the outside world, which I spend too much time doing, as I am not a big fan of any temperature below 70.

[OrdinaryBiscuit]

It's nice to know you love Asia. I agree we have a very noisy traffic here :) I'm am very much attached to tea as well can't live without it. Oh about Pakistan, there is a security threat in the area according to CNN, hope they can resolve it because their country is a beauty.

[WannabeWriter]

This made a good read! As Nancy said, we in the UAE cannot be really considered multi-cultural as we can lead a completely Indian life here! :-)

Haven't been blog reading or writing for sometime. Also I am not able to access your page from home. I can read it only from office! So read your last few posts only now. Hope Geoff and you are doing better now!

[Agnes]

WannabeWriter: As long as you don't drive like typical Indians, I can live with that :-)

OrdinaryBiscuit: I am very concerned about Pakistan right now.

[Prashanti]

Loved this post Agnes!! I am soo late to comment. Wishing Geoff a very speedy recovery !! Take care !

[jacqueline]

thanks for sharing a part of you with us. :) they say that if you can manage to drive anywhere in Asia, you are most likely to drive well some place else. :) roads are crazily congested, i know.

take care. :)

[Nancy]

Actually Dubai is more westernised than most of the muslim countries. Like we[expats] say here....if we really have no choice but to live in a middle-east country then let it be Dubai;-D

Nope u r not wasting ur time replying;-D

And loved what Mehreen had to say abt u...something I always thought but wasn't able to put it into words:-))

[Zhu]

Sorry for coming so late, it has been a crazy week... but better late than never!

This is a great post, and it shows that you are truly a world citizen. I understand your love for Asia, even though I only know China. I feel home in China. Sure, it's a confusing country but I get by just fine and I love the local logic and view of the world. Like you, I like street food and yes, I mastered Chinese bathrooms (the latter was a necessity anyway!).

I guess I am European, by birth. My roots still show in my education. I value history and usually think 200 years ago was "yesterday". I like culture and the way of life.

But I also adopted North America and Canada and I'm glad I'm here. This is the place where I feel I can control my destiny and where everything is possible.

Thank you so much for the article, I'm proud to have inspired you :-)

[Princess]

wow, multicultural woman, I'm so glad that I got to know one like you, keep rocking

[Penny]

This is the coolest post I have ever read for a very long time.
I believe everybody has many different sides of them, which makes people so complicated and fun at the same time.
Living in different countries are definitely a great experience.

[Jonathan]

Okay... your blog just became my favourite. I'll admit to laughing when you started on about getting a double chin.